Woman scolds stepson's bio mom's affair partner for giving stepson a buzzcut he didn't want, she refuses to take accountability: ‘Don't cut his hair again’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Feb 21, 2025 9:00 PM EST

Children don't get to make a lot of choices when they're young… that's what their mothers and fathers are for! So, the least their parents could do is let them have the haircut they want. Navigating parental duties is difficult in a family where you're dealing with stepmoms, biological moms, ex-wives, affair partners, and the like. You might never know which boundaries are to be crossed or kept, but you do know one thing: Respect does not see age. A child should receive just as much respect as their parent, especially just as much as their parent's partner (who started as an affair partner).

In this next story, a woman goes off on her stepson's biological mother's affair partner after she buzzcuts his long curly hair. Her stepson is seemingly upset about it, but the affair partner feels little to no remorse as shown in her responses. A discussion on parental duties ensues…

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  • If you don't know your place in your partner and their child's life, your best bet is to take the side of his son rather than his ex-wife and their partner. In this instance, the woman explains that the ex-wife's affair partner accidentally buzzed part of the child's hair off. However, the woman and the majority of the commenters under the post believe it was done on purpose, possibly to strip parental duties away from the woman as the child's stepmom…

  • "I told her she should never go near his head with clippers again."
    via Daiga Ellaby For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "AITA for how I reacted to my husband’s ex wife’s girlfriend buzzing my stepsons hair?"

    This is a throwaway and all names have been changed. To explain the relationships here, I, 30f, married my husband, Alex 31m about a year ago, but we've been together for four years. He was
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  • previously married and after they had agreed to divorce, she told him she was pregnant. We'll call his ex Kate, 30f. Kate had been cheating on Alex with Jess, 32f, for about a year. I had known Alex for years through mutual friends and I met his son when he was 6 months old.
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  • So present day, kate and jess are together still, but very hot and cold. I went to pick up my stepson from school, Jess had dropped him off, and he seemed quiet and sad, I asked him what
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  • was wrong and he said he was sad because he had no hair. He has beautiful curly hair he told us he wanted to grow out into a mullet. At that time, my husband cleared it with his mom that they were both ok with that, and she agreed to have me trim it as needed like around his ears.
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  • He took his hat off and it was buzzed down to his scalp. I was shocked but just said 'well I think you look very handsome but I thought you wanted to grow it out, why did you cut it'
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  • Apparently Jess was going to 'trim' it and forgot to put a guard on, when she realized that, it was too late and she had to buzz it.
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  • When we got home I called kate. She didn't know how bad the haircut was and was at a work event. She suggested I make sure I get the whole story on what happened so with her
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  • permission I went right to Jess after I called my husband, who was driving home from a couple hours away, and explained what was going on.
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  • So I call Jess, ask to verify what he said and tell her how upset he was. She said that is exactly what happened but didn't see why it was such a big deal. She kept saying I'm overreacting and it's
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  • just hair so I tried to explain that as a kid there's so much he doesn't get a say in, so it was a big deal to him. I told her she should never go near his head with clippers again.
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    via Blake Cheek For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • She came back with 'well you're not his mom' and when I reminded her she wasn't either she said 'I'm a h l of a lot closer than you, I've been there since day 1' to which I said 'yeah, because you were an affair partner. Don't cut his hair again' and hung up.
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  • I called my husband back to explain everything and calm. down, he had been on the phone with kate discussing things as well, and I texted Kate to give an overview and say I was sorry if I overreacted.
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  • It's the next day and Jess is trying to tell Kate I shouldn't be allowed to cut his hair if she can't, and i need to get my 'parenting privileges' taken away. I think that's crazy. And just to
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  • clarify my role as a stepparent, kate and my husband meet twice a year alone to discuss parenting things, and at the last one kate said she is comfortable with seeing me as a parent and is
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  • ready to include me in the meetings going forward. But AITAH for being upset with Jess for not only buzzing his hair but for how she reacted trying to minimize it?
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  • coldgator NTA and I don't believe Jess. As soon as she saw that she'd shaved it too short in one area, that meant she had to shave his entire head? I bet she didn't like that she was the only one not included in the mullet decision so she did this on purpose.
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  • Aromatic_Recipe1... I don't understand how Jess is going to trim his hair and makes a "mistake" that results in a buzz cut. It doesn't make sense, she shouldn't have even anywhere near his scalp. She did this on purpose.
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  • RabbidOLuigi NTA who's actually taking care of the kid matters way more than genetics. And he should have the say on his haircut so she shouldn't have cut his hair off if that wasn't what he wanted
    via Rabbid0Luigi
  • ApprehensiveBook... NTA. This sounds maliciously intended. But if not how about Jess cut her hair to match stepson's so he doesn't feel singled out? I mean if it's only hair and not a big deal she won't mind.
    via ApprehensiveBook4214
  • TeachingClassic5... I think she is lying. She did it. in purpose. What part of a mullet would she have needed clippers for? Why would she have been shaving near his scalp even with a guard? If you are trimming long hair, you would use scissors not clippers. She isn't apologetic because it was intentional.
    via TeachingClassic5869

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aita entitled parents married with children reddit story parenting husband cheating ex wife entitled reddit thread ex husband Reddit Parenting Fail parents children entitled people Parenting FAILS
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